So, I'm Back.

And the hols are over, hurr durrrrr. I cant belive 2 weeks went by that fast! Sabah, VBS, hanging out, it all ate my days away... and now its back to school with midterms results :B. What joy.


Sarcasm aside I enjoyed my hols, 'twas quite boring at first, but it got awesome towards the end. Man. I can't wait till SPM finishes, im officially free -___-.


So Sabah, I had seafood, which was EXPENSIVE. I'll never order lobster again D; , I drove an auto saga BLM the whole time there, with bald tires and a so-so standard audio system and only hitz.FM on. Yeah the rest were muhlay chanels, dont blame me ahaha.


I kinda miss the simplicity of living there already, the town is SO SMALL. The airport is literally, 10 minutes away with average driving and 6 min's with my sorta driving. Mount KKB (har-de-har-har 8D) is 2 hours drive, and the air there is sooooo cooling. Even the TOWN's air is cleaner than PJ.


Mmm but the vehicles there are like 50% 4WD's and 50% cars, really a lot of rare/old cars and 4WD's still running around too, whats Sabah, a timewarp? Awesome timewarp though :))). Sadly I didnt manage to go to the beach, the weather was rainy-painy so I kinda just went around shopping + eating LAWL.


Oh I got awesome ray-bans. HEEHEEHEE. 1 point up for coolness for myself, and its original too. I'm so proud of my aviators, now I can look like a pilot or... my dad :p. Gold rimmed with green lens, what.a.classic. Now i've gotta get red wayfarers to complete my collection :].




So besides SABAH, VBS happened too.




Hmm 2 full days with kids, what fuuuun. I was grumpy the first day but i'm glad how things turned out. I'm so glad that Decky & Aly were there, Aly being unofficial and joining cuz I asked her to HAHAHA. I wish I could permanantely hire both of them to be photographers for VBS. My pics really really sucked, no joke. Moderate lighting + kids running around + lack of a proper flash = tons of blur pics.


Due to that, next on my wishlist would be a flash. I gotta talk to Decky & Aly on this :O.


ANYWAYS. The trip to the science center with the kids were fun :p. Some kid said I have different girlfriends every year at the VBS. My my, i'm a player and somebody noticed? How kiut :'). Ahaha but he's 11, what does he know? They're my churchmates who I grew up with, not candidates.


The kids were scared by the scary/retarded dinosaurs, fascinated by the sciency (?) stuff, and uhm, hyper. REALLY HYPER. HAHAHAHA too bad for all of you who weren't photographers ;p. That includes Aly, who forgot to bring her camera. Oh Decky forgot his flash too.


Ah and i've gotten back to reality, exam results were... realistic? Bottom of the class, no surprise there heh. Time to start studying if not im gonna drown before SPM :(. Downloaded NFS world to play with Aaron, Isaac and Cal, HUGE HUGE dissapointment. Paying with real money to lower the car? Im a student kay, no muhnee.


Listening to geek in the pink now by Mraz, time passes by fast. I just realised how OLD this song is... and how old i'm getting lulz. I'd better start planning what I wanna do with my life, I cant stay 17 forever :(.

Its Simple.

Dont like my blog? Dont read it, dont like what I say, dont read it!

Yes i'm aiming this at whoever, my parents, relatives, friends. I made this so I can talk to myself, dont like it? DONT READ IT.

SURPRISE SURPRISE!

Guess who sms'd me? NO NOT HER. She never does. It's been someone I have not been in contact from since last year, since Cal broke up with her. Yuppp. Cal's ex.

Lawl due to privacy issues I won't mention her name, but I think whoever knows me & Cal knows her. Indirectly. HEHHH. Anyways 30 second recap! She deleted all of us from her life after the breakup, even after all I did for her, so since then lets just say I never had much motive talking to her.a

So surprise surprise. She's worshiping(phing?) for VBS this weekend and oh-boyeee. Im the photographer for the event, akwarrrrd. This evening was supposed to be the practice session for them so of COURSE the situation was akwarder than a teacher-student danceoff.

But to cut the story short, after everything when I got home I got a text from her, saying how she's sorry and stuff for ignoring me, or mmm isolating herself. Okay, sincerely after reading that I feel like an ass lah. It's kinda unfair how i've been effing nasty to her cause of her deleting me from her life, it made me HORRIBLE just as well. As Christians were supposed to love one another, and here I am hating someone I used to be so close to.

I think I should try to make her happy again and not be an ass, at least shes humble enough to say sorry haha :D.

Speaking of happy hmm. I still wonder on how I can affect someones relationship... it's odd lah Cal's ex used to have a tiny crush on me while they were dating haha. HARHARRRR. I FEEL 'TARDED AGAIN.
It's not faaaairrrrrr lah, why when im nice to people I dont intend to get they get attracted, but it doesnt work vice versa? If im gonna have to be nice to someone who has liked me before i'll have to be more cautious this time around *sighs*. I just wanna make her happy again so she can move on, holding stuff in is not gooood. Its a no-no D; . I think it affects us all physically as well as emotionally, #justsayin y'know?

Well i'll always try to make anyone happy, its the least I could do. I don't wanna try to get anyone for now lah, i've run out of reasons to chase that fantasy of mineee. I wish I could get someone to cheer ME up, come to realise I haven't been genuinely happy since forever.

Hence the flatlining status in whatsapp. I could say that describes how I feel now, I cant feel anything. Sadness, happiness, hope, nothing. I just feel.dead. Whatever I love to do, or whoever, I cant get. Drums I cant have a drumset, car I cant go crazy with it, girl... hmm. I'm not gonna force her, if shes happy with another guy im happy, well somewhat, but you get where im going.

I never really got what I need at all. I've gotten things i've wanted, but not needed.

SOOOOOO. Surprise surprise, it's life, I guess i'll have to earn what I want someday. Thank GOD I don't have to earn my salvation through good deeds, the only thing in life that I want I get.

Its Not Fair...

How you can keep me wrapped around your little finger, by doing absolutely nothing. Mmhm.

I don't blame you though, whats there to blame? :B Anyways guhhhh i've got so much to do to my car + studies.


Lets list out whats lacking on my car:

• Carbs. I need more power, my car is effing slow. 'Nuff said.
• Anti-Roll bars. I just love to corner hard, you jelly?
• Louder & smoother exhaust. Mine now's just... farty and pretty quiet. I'd like more noise :|.
• Bucket seat: For cornering hard! Of course :).
• Le' license plate: Mine's being held on by zipties cause it broke off -_-".

I think thats all for now, i'd be pretty happy to get all of the above soon haha :D. 

So What's Next?

Its the first of June and uhm... im at Calvin's house bumming overnight. I think I ate too much, had 1 can of shandy too much and im tired.

I've always wonder'd how if life was like glee? They can have fun & romance in the most inappropriate moments, i'm jelly (read: jealous). I think im jealous of a lot of things oddly. Richer people, funnier people, awesome-er people, and the list goes on and on.

Mmm i've been wondering also what kinda girls fit with whoooo. Likeeee among the people I hang with, so far OFFICIALLY Cal is my only bud who's taken. His girl is well, pretty much like him. Easy going, photogenic, nice, relaxed, open-minded and not quick to judge. She reminds me so much of Cal sometimes ahaha.

So here's what im thinking. If she reflects his personality, how would my girlfriend be wei? Or Chung's, Daniel's (Loh), or even JX?


HAHAHA mine would have to be sarcastic, have reserved humor and easy going. I think nowadays im not as funny as I used to be :o. I think I WANNA TAKE UP PSYCHOLOGY after SPM :D.

God...

... you know what? I think it would be awesome if you answered this last request with a no, I can finally be at peace.

Me Being Me!

How do you change something that defines you?


This post is kinda link'd up from the post below, I got a smack of reality in my face just now on my cursing. I used to curse like in EVERY sentence and thing I typed. Its been many many moons now that i've actually stopped that but it still lingers.

The cursing lingers when:



• Im mad.
• Im crazy happy.
• Im panicking, nervous, not thinking straight.
• Combination of above. LUL.

So uhm uhhh. Odd lah. I blew up online yesterday, and yeaaaah *rolls eyes* guess who saw it? The whole world. Yay meeee. Hilang muka again. I miss those days where I could just be rude to the whole world and make them laugh.

Its a process of growing up though. Thinking about it right, i'm so full of hidden flaws only to be revealed when im angry, i'm amazed I still have friends. And I really lost my touch in making people LAUGH for no reason at all.

Or maybe its cause I hang with stupid people most of the time. Only my church friends and close friends get my jokes, we all joke teh same HAHA. Anyways...


... as a summary, I love being me. If im not accepted for my flaws, and am going to be discriminated by a CERTAIN group of people I dont wanna belong there, ever. Im tired, off to bed, g'night :).